Where Was God in the Middle of My Trauma?

If you’re a broken human living in a broken world, I’m sure you’re more familiar with trauma than you’d like to be. You may have been forced to face it for many long years, or you may not be as familiar with it as others are. But trauma undeniably plays a much too large part in this fallen world that we dwell in.

I was introduced to trauma at a very young age, and it very quickly made itself comfortable in the home of my heart. It decided it wanted to take its shoes off and kick its feet up on the coffee table to stick around for awhile. From loss, bullying, depression, divorce, self harm, suicidal thoughts, a house fire, abuse, disease… It’s taken on many different forms in my life and decided it wanted to be a permanent guest in my life no matter how unwelcome it is or no matter how many times I try to kick it out.

A few months ago, I was sitting with a friend weeping to her about a few traumas that I was walking through—a very heavy breakup, emotional abuse from a “loved” one, and my dad’s death. She prayed for me and as soon as she began praying, the Lord gave me a vision of the Father sitting on the couch next to me. He rested His head on mine with tears streaming down His face and much sorrow in His Spirit. In that moment, He said to me “Daughter, I see the victory that you’ll get in the end from this, but right now, I’m choosing to hurt with you. I’m choosing to mourn with you. I’m choosing to weep with you.” and I don’t know about you, but I feel like that’s one of the most beautiful and accurate depictions of the Father’s heart for our trauma.

The thing about God is He could simply just sympathize with our trauma and feel sorry that we’re walking through it. He could’ve easily just sat next to me and offered a shoulder to cry on. But instead, He choose to empathize with my heartbreak. He chose to feel it with me. He chose to cry with me, not just for me. He sat in my pain with me—reminding me of the victory that is to come, but also reminding me that it’s okay to sit in the sorrow.

One of my favorite scriptures is 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 which says “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” and I love this scripture with my entire heart because one of my favorite things about God is the fact that He is a God full of compassion towards His children. He promises us in Psalm 34:18 that He is near to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. He is our Father—a Father that nourishes us, cares for us, and ministers to the deepest depths of our hearts—even the parts we feel as if could never be healed. He made a covenant with us to never leave nor forsake us—even in the midst of trauma.

The thing about God is He doesn’t always protect us from trauma, but He always protects us through it. When given to God, no ounce of the trauma will go unused for the furthering of His Kingdom and betterment for ourselves. He tends to have a way of taking the dust from our shattered hearts and making something miraculous out of it.

Trauma may unexpectedly barge into the home of your heart, but oh friend, never forget the place of victory you have when you invite Jesus into it. He heals what seems impossible to be healed. He mends the torn apart pieces of our spirits. He breathes life into situations that have brought oh so much death.

So, where was God in the middle of our trauma?
He was there.
Wrapping His arms around us even if we couldn’t feel it.
Speaking life over us even if we couldn’t hear it.
Crying with us even if we couldn’t see it.

Take heart, sweet friend.
Trauma is no match for the presence of God and has no rightful place in His Kingdom. It may take up temporary residency in your life, but a promised day is coming where disappointments will be no more, every ounce of hurt will vanish forever, and trauma will cease to exist.

But for now while we’re still dwelling in this broken earth where trauma still has a say, just be held by Him. Make your home in His presence. He is making all things right—and that’s a promise.

4 thoughts on “Where Was God in the Middle of My Trauma?

  1. Beautifully written, Romans 8:28 came to mind (my favorite verse);
    “all things work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose”, meaning no matter what we’re going through, we win, because Christ won the war on the cross. So in saying this, thank you for sharing Nadia.


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