Today I got the news that I’ll be moving from my small, familiar town to a big, unfamiliar city in two weeks. I visited Bethany Global University in Minneapolis in August and immediately felt the call. The comfort, the joy and the peace of the Lord was overwhelming. These past few months have been a roller-coaster and I’ve been through seasons I didn’t even know existed. Seasons that have been trying. Seasons that have been challenging. Seasons that left me questioning my faith. Seasons of dryness. And ultimately… seasons of unknown.
I can’t say that I would ever want to experience this season again because of the ultimate dryness and distance I’ve felt from the Lord, but on Sunday, my pastor talked about the wilderness (dry seasons) and a thought came to my mind: going through the wilderness with complaint and grumbling will do nothing but extend your stay.
This is the exact thing I’ve been struggling with amidst this season of unknown. Rather than thanking God for seasons, I chose to grumble and complain because this current one is less than desirable in my life.
But… that’s part of being a Christ follower. Unknown seasons. Trusting that the Lord knows what He’s doing. Even the dry ones can still be filled with joy and blessings, it all depends on your attitude during them. If you’re filled with complaint, your stay will be extended. If you’re filled with thanksgiving towards the Lord, your stay will not only be shortened but you will grow, learn and flourish like never before.
Almost every time I allow the Lord to pour into me and let His presence overwhelm me, I have the same thought, “wow, Lord, I never want to leave your presence.” That’s something I try to look back on each time I feel distant from the Lord and remind myself that it’s I who has left God’s presence, not His presence who has left me.
In this season, I felt like I completely lost who I was.
I felt like I lost intimacy with God.
I felt like I lost my calling.
But the good news is that those are lies.
Not lost, just lost in You.
God uses seasons to teach us, to grow us and to root us into a deeper connection with His Kingdom. So rather than continuing this season with complaint and grumbling, I will continue with thanksgiving for seasons that God uses to grow us in intimacy with Him.
Planted, not buried.
He changes times and seasons; He removes kings and sets up kings; He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding. / Daniel 2:21
I think it’s ironic that I’m feeling this season of unknown here and now because naturally, I assume that I’ll be feeling the same thing but to a further extent when I move because that’ll really be a season of unknown. A new city with no familiar faces… A new church, new friends, a new school… Wow. What a season of unknown. It’s going to be possibly the most challenging thing I’ve ever done but I’m so excited to see what the Lord has in store for me!
If you’re going through a familiar season, keep seeking that intimacy with the Lord. It’s there. He desires it. He’s waiting for it. Don’t give up on Him because of the fact that you don’t “feel” Him like you used to. Remember, God is not a feeling. He is a being who desires to be obeyed rather than He desires to be felt. Seek that obedience and keep it. He knows best and He wants best.
Pray for me as I pray for you.
Love you guys,
For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it. / Isaiah 55:10-11